modesty · Uncategorized

A little compliment goes a long way

“Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord; she shall be praised.”

– Proverbs 31:30 KJV

I should start off by saying I am a working mom.  Its is not fun to be away from my child or my home but I do the best I can.  I have been, however, able to work my schedule so that I have 3 days off every week and still have 40 hours (those other 4 days can be very long.)  I am usually off every Monday and about three weeks ago I decided it would be nice to surprise Ethan (my hubby) with a mocha frappe from Mcdonalds (it is like his favorite thing in the whole world lol!) I decided that I would try to make myself look pretty also.  I decided to put on some makeup, fix my hair in a simple yet nice updo, and then it came time to pick the outfit out.

Now I know it may sound strange to go to such great lengths just to bring my husband a drink, but we have been together for 11 years (7 married) and it doesn’t hurt to spice things up a bit.

I began to grab for that favorite pair of jeans when something just told me to look up.  At the very top shelf of my closet sat a bag that has been there for over a year.  In this bag, rested a nice below-the-knee length skirt that I had bought shortly after having Finley.  I bought this skirt with the intention to wear after I had lost the baby weight.  Well it has taken a little longer than expected to accomplish that and so the bag with the skirt went to the top of the closet and was basically fogotten about.  Well I am about ten pounds over my pre-baby weight and so I thought I would just see if it fit anyway. It did.  I carefully examined the rest of my closet to see if I could find a shirt that would match.  Once I finally got dressed I headed off to my destination.

Once I arrived at Ethan’s job, he told me something that has changed everything for me…”you look really nice.” Those four words struck a cord with me.  Now I don’t want to give the impression that my husband never compliments me because that is not the case.  What struck me was the way he said it and the look on his face as he did.  This was not the first time I had ever dressed up or wore a dress/skirt in general; but it was the first time that I truly felt nice-looking.

After I went home I began to examine the feelings that I was having.  Was it the skirt? Was it the makeup? What was making me feel so good about myself?  It finally clicked for me that it was the fact that I had impressed my husband!  After 11 years together,  I still could make him notice me.  I was not dressed ultra fancy or provocative.  I didn’t need to be.

It was then that I truly began to wonder what really mattered when it came to beauty.  I realized I needed to make some changes.  In my last post I had mentioned that I have come to learn about modesty.  I wanted to know what the Bible had to say about it, what God expected of me, and how I could please my husband.  I knew what I had to do.

I had made the decision that I was going to set a new standard for myself when it came to how I dressed.  I was going to wear modest clothing that honored God and my spouse. Like I have said before, I never considered myself an immodest dresser but when I started to look at what the Bible said, it just did not mix with what was in my closet.  I decided that I was no longer going to wear anything that came above my knees and nothing that showed cleavage.  I, at first, did still plan on wearing pants but I feel like God has even convicted me of that.  I do not think that it is wrong for a woman to wear pants, but the way I felt that day I wore the skirt, I wanted to feel like that all the time.  I also could not shake the verse:

Deuteronomy 22:5 KJV

“The woman shall not wear that which pertaineth unto a man, neither shall a man put on a woman’s garment: for all that do so are an abomination unto the Lord thy God.”

 

Now I get that when this bible verse was written men and women really both wore “dresses.”  However, in this time we know that normally women wear dresses and men wear pants.  I felt as though God really wanted me to be modest and be feminine by wearing modest skirts/dresses all the time.  Now I will say that I still do wear pants to work because I work in horticulture.  I constantly have to bend over and I do not want anything showing that should not be.  Also the time has not come around to order new uniforms yet, but when they do I will be looking into what they have for skirts to see if it could be possible for me to wear them at work too.

Now before anyone may get to upset with this let me say this…I believe that the way a person dresses is matter between them and God.  Every woman in my family wears pants: Christian or not so I do not condemn those that do not choose to only wear dresses/skirts.  This was a personal choice for me.  Of course, Ethan liked me dressing more “girly” but he DID NOT encourage me to do this.  I knew this was a choice I had to make on my own.

Its has only been a few weeks…but I have never felt better about myself.

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