Jesus answered and said to him, “What I am doing you do not understand now, but you will know after this.”
John 13:7 NKJV
So anyone can tell you that marriage is HARD! It’s true, marriage can be extremely difficult.
After Ethan and I moved back to my home town I thought that things would finally fall into place. However, being away from his family made life extremely difficult. When I lived away from my family, I will not lie, I struggled being so near to his family and not my own. I did not feel like they cared that I was so far away from the only home that I ever knew, and I did not see a lot of sympathy (at least it did not come across that way). I also felt that maybe he did not love me enough to move to be with me. I would be being dishonest if I did not say that I felt resentment towards him and his family for not being able to be with mine. To be truthful, I still struggle with that resentment to this day.
So when Ethan started to feel unhappy about being away from his family, I am sad to say, I did not have much sympathy for him. In my heart I thought “now you know how I felt.” Looking back, I hate that I felt and acted that way. I know I was not being a good wife.
Well, as anyone can guess, Ethan and I argued A LOT!!! In all this time we were still trying to have a baby. Bad timing I suppose, but I still wanted what I wanted. After about three years of being apart, Ethan’s family (to my huge surprise) decided to move back to where Ethan and I were currently living. This was a blessing, but it did not come without difficulty. I say that because I have had some ups and downs with his parents. I love them, but we are very different people from one another.
I wish I would have known that this was all just a part of His greater plan…